Your silence scares me

i wish i had the words to tell you that everything is going to be ok. that i could wrap my arms around you and hold you, and let you know that someone in this world is in your corner. i wish that i weren’t on the other side of the country, that i cuold just drop everything and drive over and help you through all this. there is only so much that California can offer, when i am still California and you are still NC. my heart is aching, breaking, and reaching out for you in any possible away. i don’t want to see you let yourself fall, don’t want to see you break. you are MY strength, and now i feel more helpless than ever. words won’t help you anymore, if anything they agitate your fragile mood. i’m not the girl you want, but i’m the friend you need. if that fact alone could change things i would be more at ease but its the simple fact that it can’t. what you need right now i simply cant give you. i’m not the glue that holds you together… out of the darkness you will find a light, a strength, and it will get you through. i hold onto the hope that i can guide you through your most difficult time, that i can make you see the light on the other side; let you see that you WILL make it through this… but really how much can California do?